So here's a compilation of totally unhelpful tips for taking on the city. First thing I suggest is to stay at the Swiss and get an awesome view like we did. You can drink mimosas in your room while watching the river turn green. No need to fight the crowd.
Try to wear some poorly-applied glittery green nail polish. Don't forget your metro pass!
The most important part of St. Patrick's Day is the outfit. Your friends will take lots of pictures of you standing in front of the river, being flexible on various objects, or simply sitting on a sidewalk. You must looks good at all times. I suggest head-to-toe green with rainbow accents.
Other things you'll need to do:
Eat Chicago-style deep dish pizza!
Go to the Wiener Circle!
Drink at a rooftop bar!
Take a limo to McDonald's For a Shamrock Shake!
Watch a KU game at Kincaids!
Try not to get too schnockered and embarrass yourself and your friends!